All of the actors in The Big Year have been in far worse movies; only thing is they’ve also been in much better movies. A colossal waste of time and talent The Big Year unwinds in magnificent locations and tells the story of a group of disparate characters who track species of birds in North America with the goal of sighting the highest number.

You’d have to be a member of the Houston (or local) Audubon Society, and there were several in the audience I saw the movie with, to give this film a pass. I’d be the first to admit that bird watching can be a highly intellectual and really spiritual way to pass time. Only in The Big Year the protags are insensitive men who literally won’t fuck their hotter than hot wives in order to hang out with other losers who’re avoiding their own life issues.

Steve Martin, Jack Black, and Owen Wilson star. At one point Martin starts doing his “wild and crazy guy” dance, which can only serve as a reminder to audiences on how recycled The Big Year truly is. The credit roll has a dizzying montage of over 700 birds that actually had a smidgeon of cinematic credibility.

- Michael Bergeron